5 Secrets to a Happy & Healthy Marriage

Are you looking for ways to improve your marriage? Here are some thing that helps us in our marriage! Marriage is no easy feat, and yet God calls us to die to our own wants and desires by becoming one flesh with our spouse. It’s beautiful, but it’s no secret that it’s hard sometimes. I’ve had many ups and downs in my marriage, though I am happy to say we have spent the majority of our marriage in a good season. 

However, we have definitely experienced spiritual warfare. Remember, Satan desperately wants to destroy marriages and families. That’s why it’s so important to be self aware of our part in the relationship. We should be giving to our spouse as much as we are able, striving always to be a biblical wife. The best thing you can do for your husband is to love him where he is now, and perfect yourself going forward. 

Here a few things you can implement in your relationship today that will bring happiness to your marriage:

1. Show Affection

Don’t be afraid to show your spouse affection! The best gift you can give your children is to love your spouse, so let your children see you holding hands. Flirt with your husband! Date your husband. Let your children see your face light up when he enters a room. Let them see how much you both love each other. Show your husband that you’re not afraid to let others know how much you love him. 

2. Don’t Compare Roles

It’s easy to get caught up in a tit-for-tat, but try not to compare yourselves to each other. (For example, “I woke up late with the kids last night, so you need to make us breakfast!”) That kind of relationship is not healthy. I encourage you to challenge yourself to look at marriage differently. Instead of asking what your spouse can do for you, ask yourself, how can I give to my spouse

There is a holiness to giving of yourself so completely without expecting anything in return. Of course, I am not suggesting you be a doormat. It is important for our spouse to acknowledge our feelings and treat us with dignity. But keep in mind that a grateful spouse will naturally want to give back. If you focus on having a joyful spirit, you will cultivate joy within your home.

3. Respect Your Husband

It’s important to have a strong connection with your husband and that you do things together. Remember that you are a partnership, so you must both work to please each other. Try not to get in habit of demanding things. (“You must do this to make me happy!”)

Your husband is the head of the home, so don’t treat him like a nuisance. (Have you ever heard women joke that their husband is just another child they have to care for? That’s the worst!) Let him lead, and treat him with respect.  

4. Share Your Spouse’s Interests

Eric and I are complete opposites. I love baking, cooking, being a home maker, and doing my daughters’ hair. My husband is a total guy — he loves watching football and lifting heavy weights. In fact, we have such different temperaments, that we scored completely opposite each other on a personality test! Despite that, I think it’s important to try to show interest in your spouse’s hobbies. So, sometimes I’ll sit down and watch a Notre Dame game with my husband. 

When brainstorming ways to spend time together, ask yourself what he might enjoy. (What kind of movies does he like?) Hopefully, you both get to take part in each other’s interests! 

5. Build Your Husband Up 

Ok, so this last one is SO important. It might not come naturally to you, but make sure you build your husband up. Thank him for working hard and helping out. If you have grievances, talk to him privately. It’s unhealthy to tear down your husband, especially in front of other people. There is nothing more upsetting than hearing a woman complaining about her husband to her friends, or even worse, belittling him in front of others. 

You should be your husband’s biggest cheerleader! Everybody wants a cheerleader. We all want someone in our corner, lifting us up and affirming us. 

If you want some extra inspiration, I highly recommend watching the movie Fireproof. It’s an excellent film that really dives deep into marriage. I hope this has given you some inspiration. If you have any tips on things that have improved your marriage, drop a comment below!

In Christ,

Heather Johnson

2 Responses

  1. Your wonderful!!
    I’m trying to understand the rosary…
    Then I see this on marriage’s.
    My husband is a good person, I just can’t forgive him out I’m with him 24yrs. (Imagine I’m still trying) I’m been holding on by a thread. 2 daughters (22 & 18) they wonder why we are married??
    He is not affectionate, so I stopped trying.
    I have reconnected to my faith in last 4 mos.
    It feels amazing! I’m so grateful .
    I just feel like I need him to put effort in, I do pray on it.
    But he seems angry.
    We have a anxious & depressed daughter it’s put a lot on our marriage.
    I’m sorry I’m going on & on.
    I wish I knew which rosary to buy (I have my daughters from her sacrament) I would like my own, maybe you can help with that.?
    Thank you ????
    Bless you .

    1. Hi Barbara ,
      I just read your comment . Marriage is tough . I was wondering if your parish would have info on a “ marriage encounter” weekend . It really is a great thing . We will be married almost 46 yrs . Together almost 50 yrs . We have two kids almost 45 yr old boy almost 43 yr old girl . Two grandkids from my girl . Boy 6 girl 4 . They are the love of our lives . We’ve had our troubles . But I refuse to be a “ statistic “ I kept one eye closed at all times and don’t sweat the small things . My hubby is not affectionate either I am a very 64 and my hubby is an old 68 yr old lol it is what it is . He is my very best friend . But see if you can do a marriage encounter where you both can dialog together we went to one 25 yrs ago renewed our vows like 7 times Lolol good luck to you

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Hi, I’m Heather! Welcome to this blog! I’m a Catholic YouTuber, wife, and mother to 5 beautiful children ages 3-12. My greatest joy is my vocation of being a wife, mother, homemaker, and home chef. My YouTube ministry is where I love spreading hope, joy, and encouraging all to love Christ with their whole hearts.

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